Day to Myself

I did a lot of spiritual work today. I didn't have the kids with me, so I decided to use my free time for me rather than on the house. I went to the book store and spent 2 hours there, first to wander around the spiritual and religion sections, and then to get a coffee and read Pure Inspiration Magazine.

There was a lot of great information in there, as usual, and quite a few articles hit me right in the heart. It's amazing how much of "me" I can read into articles about other people; it just goes to show that we aren't as separate from each other as we might think we are!

One of my favorite things I read was an article about Dr. Catherine Northrup. I've heard her name a few times, but I never knew she was such an inspiration in the medical field. She is a paramount figure in Womens health, but her message is true about all human kind. She realizes the holistic approach to our health is so important; that our minds are connected to our bodies in ways that people don't think about very often, and that can lead to a lot of illnesses that may be avoided. We all know it's true, because when we feel badly about ourselves or about situations in our lives, we tend to get sicker easier. Her philosopy is very real and very spiritual... Quite an interesting Lady.

There was so much circling my brain when I left the store! I felt completely recharged and refreshed, and I even picked up 2 new books to add to all the others I'm reading ;-)

-- Jenn

I Get It

I was in a dark place for a while, but I managed to face my demons and come out the other side alright. Part was due to positive thinking, but the other part of it was due to actually facing an adverse situation in my life. In this particular situation I was forced to confront it because I had no other alternative, and it ended up working out better than I could have imagined.

I have a horrible habit of running away from what scares me or makes me unhappy rather than facing it head on. I know it's a bad habit because 9 times out of 10 it isn't as bad as I thought it was going to be, and all I ended up accomplishing was wasting hours of my life worrying about something that was out of my control in the first place. I've worked long and hard to try and change my approach to things, and I have to say that it appears to be working. Thank goodness, because I've had a lot of tests against my resolve lately!

I'm not angry any more. I've had this simmering anger toward certain things in my life, and no matter how I tried to change my views or approach the situation in a different way it just didn't matter. I'd be hurt, angry, confused, scared... all those toxic emotions that make us so unhappy in our lives. But, in facing the part of my life that was so depressing to me the past month and then having a wonderful weekend full of family and friends at my childrens' birthday party, it really proved to me that I am stronger than I gave myself credit for. I have more control over my life than I had realized (in my mind I had known, but in my heart I guess I didn't because I actually felt it this weekend and finally understood), and I am surrounded by more love than I realized. The other stuff, the bad/hurt feelings, are no longer a consideration for me. I am worth so much more than that, and there is so much that is wonderful around me that I just don't care to waste a moment on the other 'stuff.' If it hurts me or makes me feel bad then I'm done with it. I won't allow the external to control me any more, because I am stronger than that. I am NOT a result, but I AM a cause!!!!!

And so it is.

--Jenn